Sweeety718's Weblog

Its 7:11

sweeety718 — Fri, 07 Dec 2007 12:19:15 +0000

Its very EARLY in the morning. I hate having class this early. I need coffee!! I want a muffin!! but i will probably run out of time because i have to write a blog about the good life. I wish that i was done writing blogs. I have a Hard time centering the conversation because i am thinking about my muffin and coffee that i would really like to have for my 8:00 class. This class is only 50 minutes long. and by the time we start it feels like its almost over but the last 20 minutes do drag a whole lot. I wonder if this coffee and muffin and thing will happen. I think ive written in this blog a good amount of time and im still unsure what the idea of the good life is. If everyone can have a diffren good life then why is mine so important? I don’t really feel that my idea will be like everyone elses. Any way it keeps getting later and im still not sure what this blog is about. I haven’t started smoking cigs again. so thats good… i guess it all really depends on the way you look at it. Im trying to eat better but food at school sucks and healty food is expensive. that kind of puts a poor college student in a hard spot. Sometimes i think i wish i didn’t start smoking because then i wouldn’t even think about it. can’t turn back time though so i guess that though doesn’t really mater either.

What happened to thanksgiving?

sweeety718 — Fri, 30 Nov 2007 14:21:55 +0000

It feels like every year christmas starts showing up a little earlier. From the occasional x-mas songs on the radio to the ones that start playing at the stores. Its not that i don’t like x-mas but this year it feels like thanksgiving got completely passed over. I don’t really know how that happened. Thanksgiving is an important time. Its a day to realization what you have and be thankful. its not about presents or things you don’t have that you want. I think Thanksgiving gets passed over so quickly because its not a typical hallmark holiday. Maybe thats why we could all try to bring it back. Most of us celebrate it but i think alot of us forget how important it really is. As much as i would rather be doing something else then sitting in a car for 3 1/2 hours dealing with al the other “great” drivers on the road I realize that if i didn’t do that i wouldn’t be able to get back to my family for thanksgiving. So this year i gave Thanks to getting along better with my brother Tony. I gave thanks that may Dad is going to be ok, and that we were all able to be together this year as a family. So as i get over and realize in actuality the importance of Thanksgiving it kind of makes me sad that its not as important as people think it is anymore.I hope that it will not completely disappear because then what kind of society would we be? what kind of people forget to give thanks that we have all of these wonderful things in our lives?where would the world be then if we forget?

Thanksgiving without you

sweeety718 — Fri, 16 Nov 2007 15:21:18 +0000

This will be another thanksgiving without my brother and eventhough he has been gone 2 years these holidays never really do seem to get any easier. Time has made it easier to think about you but it never replaces the whole it has permanetly left in all ofour hearts. Bobby would of been 30 years old on tuesday. I don’t think you ever get used of this feeling that you get that something isn’t right but you learn to live with it to move on but it never really goes away. Each year when the hoildays come around i go see my brothers grave and wonder why he is there and not sitting at the dinner table with the rest of us. Death is such a permeant thing. Its not a mistake that you can do over because once it happens thats it. I don’t really like the holidays as much because for me and my family there is always an empty seat. Eventhough as our family gets bigger from little ones that start to grow up my brother will always be missed. Thanksgiving is the time were you should give thanks for the people you have around you and that love you back. but what if your missing the one you love? what do you do then? Do you thank “god” for the time you had with him? Maybe its just one of those things that you never really get the grasp on. I hope that one of these days the holidays will be more then a reminder of something that i have lost but something new that i am gaining. maybe one of these holidays ill be able to see everything that i am thankful for and not think that it hurts that your gone. What I hope though is that i will always be able to keep bobby’s memory with me and that just because he’s not here for thanksgiving or christmas he will always be watching over us. thats all i can realy ask for is that one day it won’t hurt as much but i know thats going to take alot of accepting things on my part and not just saying and pretending i believe it.

Coffee and cigarettes

sweeety718 — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 13:47:35 +0000

I have been smoking cigarettes and drinking coffee for a very long time and i have actuall always related the two. whenever i would get a coffee i would then light up a smoke. But recently i have made the choice to quit smoking. so my routine will now change and i will no longer be killing my-self slowly. I will never give up coffee only if i have to and that would really suck but im sure there could be worse things that could happen right? It is only day one of not being able to smoke and im hoping i can get through the weekend but maybe if i do ill be taking one more step on my own towards making it to my own “good life”. For a long time i wondered if i would ever want to quit but i guess i now i want to. hopefull i can not smoke or cheat by having a drag off of someone elses smoke but its only day 1 so i guess we will all have to wait and see how long i can go! I don’t know how much im going to miss have my coffee and a cigaretts but maybe it really is time to break such a bad habit. i guess when your addictied to something that you don’t think is very harmful you don’t really feel the need to quit. But i am tierd of my car, clothes and hair smelling like crap. i know it will be good to stop relating coffee and smokes but as long as i give up smoking maybe everything will turn out ok.

I found a band called “The good Life”

sweeety718 — Fri, 19 Oct 2007 13:57:40 +0000

I found a band called the good life and there pretty awesome! but it got me to think that music is something that really keeps me going when everything else is going wrong. Not just any music though not all that dumb pop crap that people put on the radio because they had someone else write a song that they thought that mixes well with all of the other crap thats out. I mean the music you listen that makes you feel like a totally diffrent person. the music that even when your feeling like everything in life is truning against you still have something that makes you think of a better time in your life. I need music that is a big part of my life i love listening to new bands remember the old ones that got me through diffrent stages of my life. Music can be used in so many ways i don’t even think people realize that all the time. If ou can find a band or a singer that chages how you feel then how powerful is that? we all have our one hit wonders but we also have the songs that make us think of someone we lost someone we loved or a time that we an never get back. They can be memories of time you were out at a bar with a bunch of friends that you may not hang out with anymore, or a song that you and your mom used to listen to that you thought was horrible but you still know all the words to all of those rod stewart songs.(at least i do) I was looking for something that would be apart of this good life theme and when someone gave me this band to listen to it just gave me a reason to think about how music really is such a big part of my life and how i have probably more then a 1,000 cds which half i may still listen i just know that music has a power to shape how im feeling and i don’t even know to many people that can do that. i know i have some good friends and family that would try and make me feel better but i know nothing gets me through my day like music does. If i could ever own my own music store that would be my good life with out even a thought!
Im leaving you with a lyrics from the band and i hope at least someone reads them.
Off the beaten path
Well I’m trying to be patient
But the wheels keep turning round
But it’s a treadmill and I just dragging my feet
I’m so tired of everything
Defeated by routine
By words that don’t mean anything to me
At least not anymore now that I’m done…

with a morning of a day without ending
A year of decadence to escape from penance
But I’ve suffered. I’m over it, yeah
I’m fine now, but I’m sick of it
I was happy being miserable
I used to lay down my head on the bar
And raise one lonely finger for a drink

It doesn’t have to be so difficult
just keep coasting by
so you lost a limb
Well hell it’ll heal with time
What happens when you love what you’ve lost?
You didn’t have to cut it off
But I did, and I do, and it took everything that I have
I wonder if I could ever get it back…

to how it was when I still thought of love
as a risk I could take if I was willing to make
the commitment to rejection
and the mind games, the deception
The late nights under the covers
pointing the finger at whoever started
whatever we were fighting about

I guess that I’m fine now
everything’s better
everything’s cooled down
it’s all copesetic
We’ll move on, off to a better world
To a fresh start where anything’s possible

But I’m sick of it
Yeah I’m sick of it
I’m so sick of it
No, I’m sick of it
no, no, no, no, no
I’m sick of it now
I’m just sick of it now
no, no, I am so sick of it
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no
But he’s sick of it
no, no, no,no
-the good life

American Beauty

sweeety718 — Fri, 12 Oct 2007 13:46:51 +0000

We watched American Beauty in class this week and it happens to be one of my favorite movies. its probably in my top 10. I enjoy watching it because its not like every movie you have seen out there its not all happy all the time and its not like your watching some perfect family on televison and having a happy ending. the movie is about finding happiness and making a change when you know something in your life isn’t working out for you or anyone else in the matter. but the main character does take it to a extrem in alot of ways. his personailty completly changes through out the film. He beings the film by a very passive aggressive additude and putting up with everyone that gives him grief like his wife his boss, and daughter. then as the film goes on his personality changes he stops putting up with everyone and puts him-self for the first time maybe in a long time. His marriage begins to fall apart but they both knew that it was over for a long time. with making himself happy he does become more estranged from his family even more so then he was in the beginning. Its not that he didn’t love his daughter or anything but its hard to do what you want all the time when you have a family because you have to put more of the things you want to do aside. He becomes kind of selfish in a way but i guess that really all depends on how you look at. you have a husband who no longer talks with his wife or daughter and then by trying to change he ends up losing them anyway because he then only thinks about him self and what he wants to do and what will make him happy. But maybe he just stoped caring about all the stuff in life that doesn’t really matter. I enjoy the movie because each character is going through a diffrent serious of emotions which gives you more of a chance to relate to one or many of the characters in the film. I felt it made it easier for me to compare it to some sitiuations or feelings in my life.
Kevin Spacey’s charachter lester was in search for what he thought was the good life for him and in the end figured out a way to make himself happy at the expensive of his loved ones. So did he really ever achieve the good life at all? Is that the risks you hav to take? will anyone every be able to achieve that good life or is it just something that we can think about but never be able to touch it?

The achievement of desire

sweeety718 — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 00:23:16 +0000

In the story the achievement of desire by Richard Rodriguez you can tell that he alot of troubles with wanting to be this great student and wanting to still fit in with his family at the same time. It seemed like he was really haveing a hard time try to respect his mother and father without feeling ashamed towards them. He wanted the “the good life” he wanted to be accepted by society and have a good job and be able to take advantage of his education. But it seemed like he was torn between trying to make his parents proud and not thinking that how they spoke made them look stupid. he felt ashamed of there accent and how people woule look at them. he also didn’t think that they understood the importance of school was like he did. He enjoyed studying and doing school work because he felt it was a way to better himself. his family saw it as a way for him to be better then the “gringo” students. He thought these comments as iggnorant and not the reasons why he was trying to become a better student.

I felt that the story was intresting but said in away that he felt torn between what socitey wanted and how his family saw him. I thought that its not just him who goes through identity issues with family. that sometimes its hard to show your parents that just because your trying to make a better life for your self then they that you think there dumb or trying to out do whatever they did. and its not that you don’t respect them but its just that sometimes there choices don’t always have to be your choices too. that by going to college wasn’t away of getting away but away of starting a new life for your self and that they should be proud that your trying to do something productive and not that your trying to start a new life and leave them out of it.

UGGGGHH “Dancin in the street”

sweeety718 — Fri, 21 Sep 2007 14:44:01 +0000

I read the story dancin in the street and after we talked about it in class i realized that the good life to her was dancing and she looked down upon it because she said it controlled her life. But if you love something that much and if it is truely your pasion why wouldn’t you want to do it forever. If you are one of the few people that wake up every day and enjoy what the do then why not let it take up a good part of your life. and so what that she let dancing take over why is that such a bad thing? she found something that made her happy and i dont thing that is was so wrong that she wanted to dance all the time. and if its your job that you love and are passionte about then why not let it consume up that part of your life? why not just be extremly happy about waking up and going to work everyday? wouldn’t that be the good life? waking up every day to something you actually wanted to do. Because for me if i had the chose i would love to have that!! i don’t think i was so bad that her dancing took over her life i think it was a bad story of describing her passion but other then that i feel that she gave up on what she actually wanted to do and turned her passion into a problem. her passion become soething that ruined her because she didn’t embrace it she lost it. An that was the worst thing she could of ever done.

What “The Good Life” means for me.

sweeety718 — Fri, 14 Sep 2007 13:47:43 +0000

“The Good Life” isn’t something that I find myself having a hard time writting about. Im not sure really how to feel about the whole idea sincie to others it can be and probable will be something completly diffrent then my idea. I guess without getting to sentimental that it would be having a good friend I can really count on, someone who loves me, someone I love back, getting through school, having my brother back, and being happy with however my life turns out. Im not sure if ill always make enough money or if Im going to the very best at everything I do but I hope at the end of the day I can be happy about how my life ended up. ”The Good life” could mean anything and im sure how I feel about it will deffinately change over time and thorugh diffrent experinces. But for now that would be what “The Good Life” meant for me.

Hello world!

sweeety718 — Tue, 28 Aug 2007 03:17:46 +0000

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